Friday, April 27, 2012

beaten down but not broken

This has been a very rough week.... a lot of personal drama and stress...on top of trying to look for a new home...add to that a birthday in the house so there was chocolate cake! I ate more cake than I should have a little sliver here and there... I also broke down and bought a big ol bag of kettle cooked BBQ chips and ate just about the whole damn bag.... it really pisses me off that no matter how much I have overcome when the stress gets the better of me I always have to fight the urge to binge! I am lucky to have learned some alternatives to the binging but when things reach their breaking releases are not healthy ones! This is something I need to work more on.

Needless to say I did not get on the scale this morning.. I think it is important to keep a record but I know I self sabotaged so much this week... and getting on the scale would just be beating myself up for it again and I am finally in a better state of mind. So this morning I confess to you that I over ate, didn't actually binge per-say but didn't control the impulse like I should have. I also missed 2 days at the gym this week... sleep always evades me but when there is added stress it is much worse...but this morning I was back in there.. worked my legs, abs and did my cardio and I left there feeling so much better...I love the high I get after a workout.. sometimes it kills me to start one but in the end I always feel better.

I have to move on from this week, let it be a bad week that doesn't break me..... I am so much stronger than the crap that has messed me up this week. This week beat me every turn I felt like I was running into a brick wall, I might have the bruises from this week that will linger but I am not broken! At times this week I felt it but I have taught myself that I am so much stronger then I give myself credit for. (we all are) And that is how I know I am beaten but not ever ever broken!

So here is to a healthy weekend...for all of us!!

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